Therapy for Porn Addiction
Things I hear my clients say…..
"My partner discovered that I watch porn and it's caused a major rupture in our relationship"
"I'm terrified that porn is killing my sex drive or performance"
"I want to stop watching porn completely and I just haven't been able to"
"Is porn bad for me or not? I can't seem to get a straight answer."
*These are generalized statements and not direct quotes from any clients.
"Porn Addiction" or Porn Misuse can have devastating effects on the lives of those consumed by it.
Moreover, there are ever increasing numbers of programs, thought leaders and organizations with their own take on sexual health and morality that are designed to instill shame in those who engage with pornography.
Sex therapy can help you address your concerns around porn usage by helping you get clear on the place porn has in your life and to set boundaries around the ways you use it, if at all. Sex therapy can also help you develop the skills to stick to those boundaries long term and learn to recognize signs that you are slipping back into old habits before they can take over and wreak havoc on your life.
I approach Porn Addiction through a lens of impulse control rather than an addiction lens as I might in the case of a substance use disorder. The reason is that addiction treatment evangelizes abstinence - an ill-fitting approach that can often instill shame in clients when applied to their sexuality. See AASECT's stance on sex and porn addiction here: https://www.aasect.org/position-sex-addiction
Even still, unchecked porn usage, like any other habit, can start to take over our lives causing us to shirk our responsibilities, neglect our relationships or physical health, and even cause unintentional harm to our bodies.
If any of this sounds like you and you're ready to discuss how sex therapy can help you get back control over your life. I invite you to book a free consultation with me today
Frequently asked questions.
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No it is not. Porn addiction is not officially recognized by the scientific community, thus it is not currently listed in the DSM or recognized by AASECT. As with anything, it is possible to use something to excess such that it becomes harmful to the body, mind or lifestyle of the user, but it is no more “addictive” than chocolate or work, thus it is not helpful to treat it as an addiction.
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It's much more helpful to treat Out of Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB) as we might an eating disorder. It's about finding an intentional balance of usage that is guided by principles of consent and the values of the client. For some, this may mean abstaining entirely, but for many it means reducing porn use to a level that does not interfere with their day to day lives and relationships.
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This varies widely, but I advise my clients to plan to invest at least 10 sessions into therapy and evaluate whether it is resulting in the changes they want to see. As a general rule, I would expect someone just starting out to take 6 -12 months to establish a healthy relationship with porn.
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Absolutely - working with a trained AASECT Sex Therapist is your best bet for addressing OCSB using methods that are grounded in scientific research and not guided by the agendas of any governments or religions or for-profit treatment programs. I have personally worked with countless clients to establish a healthy balance with their porn usage.